For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
