Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
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