Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Randomize
