Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
