Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
