Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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