I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
He passed out mid-signature
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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