he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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