If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Randomize
