yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Randomize
