am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
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