So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
