i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
