my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize
