If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
