just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Randomize
