Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I love having hate sex.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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