My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Ketchup is God's man juice
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
How external is "for external use only"?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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