drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
