I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize
