just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
no, he came in my armpit
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
they need to just BURY HIM!
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Randomize
