I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Randomize
