So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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