Rock
Scissors
Fuck
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize