Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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