check it out our google latitudes are spooning
just come out here and I will go home with you...
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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