He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize
