I am puke
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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