hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
