I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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