I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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