she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Randomize