Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
