talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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