This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Randomize
