I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
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