if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
