so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize