it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
