and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
