i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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