Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
