okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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