Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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