well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Randomize