Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
