she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
