So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
my being single is dangerous.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
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