it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
