I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
