hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Randomize
